In Search of a Home

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Friday, August 28, 2020

Robert Fulghum: All I need to know I learnt in kindergarten


Published nearly 8 years ago, on August 18, 2012--posting once again.  As I am decluttering even now, I realise how much crap we collect.

I have been decluttering for a long time. I have already thrown out much, bought little and am going to reduce what I own as much as I can.   Travel and intercontinental living should not be glorified.  

Other than simply collecting things one gets emotionally spread out.  Because someone like me has lived in countries for long enough to call them home.  Even in countries like Fiji, where I moved three times in three years.  First arrival, then to an apartment then to the campus.  The last time I moved was only 2 years before I left Fiji, and it took me over a year to set the home again.  Which means, I enjoyed that place as a 'home' for less than a year.  There is always a feeling of restlessness.  From there I gathered so many unfinished projects.  I still have at least four of them, although I just completed 3 of them  in the last two years.  

I want to share this here.  Partly because I love his writings, even though I have outgrown them.  Maybe, it is time to return to the simplistic writing.  May be it is time to honour simplicity and a self connection. 

I hope you will enjoy reading.  I hope you will use this as an inspiration to dedicate 15 minutes to declutter.  And do it everyday for the next 30 days!!  

Watch yourself feel light and fly.....towards new heights. 

IF I MAY SAY SO MYSELF, RE-READING THIS POST BROUGHT ME SOME NUGGETS OF WISDOM THAT I CAN USE...AT THIS TIME OF MY LIFE.  Shall I thank my previous self for the wisdom?? 


Robert Fulghum: Picture, courtesy Wikipedia 


I am currently in a cleaning spree (July).  Having travelled far and wide, without much intention or planning, the insides of my house, literally, and ofcourse as a corollary insides of my brain, mind--physically and spiritually, are all tangles.  


So I know, I need to clean.  


People tell me they envy my free spirited lifestyle. I am a free spirit. I realized that a few years ago.  I am one of the very few truly independent people I have known.   Amidst all the 'put downs' I have of myself, I know I have known very few truly independent people.  In addition, I have been many people's support.  


but now, I truly need to look at myself and clean my house.  To set things straight and to see clearly where I am going next. 


So I know, I need to clean.  


A young soul comes to my house everyday, nearly 4-5 hrs-- sometimes longer.  We go through box after box, paper after paper and put them in piles that are to be put away in some sort of order.


Although we still have a great amount of ground to cover, I am already feeling like the ground that has been ploughed --not yet ready for new seeds, but some unearthing has happened, some earthworms are crawling, some of them have accidentally been cut off into two (I hope they will grow full length soon) some little pieces of gems have emerged...


But many many memories have unearthed.  


Among other things, I found an old planner.  A planner which reminded me how much I wrote.  How many letters went out to other people.  How much money and time--,mostly time ---I invested in keeping in touch with people.  Remembering people's birthdays, anniversaries....


I used to write so many letters that I had to mark them in a calendar to remind me who I wrote to, when and when was the next letter due, regardless of whether or not I heard from those people.  Today, only a few of those poeple remain in my life.  Those are the ones who have stuck by, and followed me on my trek around the world.  We have managed to keep in touch.


I will update the information about Mr. Olsen from the post title 'Making friends is the only worthwhile thing to to... I called him yesterday and his wife picked up.  She knew instantly who I was, and that warmed my heart. That is what we get after years of keeping in touch.  A familiarity, a deepening. 


Back to my planner.  In there I found one unlikely name, Robert Fulghum.  



I had forgotten about that.  

I think I wrote to the publishing house, that at the back cover of one of his books had provided the address with a note, 'If you wish to contact the author, please write to...'


Robert Fulghum!!  It was a strange name when I first heard it, no first read it.  In the late 80s.  This was before I had left home, and I was fascinated with his simplistic writing dripping with insight.


He wrote a book that survives even today and is passed around as gift to the young, on their graduation or weddings.  That is the stretch, the reach of this simple book, packed with wisdom.


May be, cleaning is not just about cleaning.  In clearing, which is recommended by Feng Shui advisors, we might accidentally meet our earlier self.  It is like taking a walk, a bit backwards, so that we may realize how far we have come.  How much we have grown and with a great fervor look towards the future.


I still like his writing but since my fascination with Mr. Fulghum, I have had many writers in between, who have influenced my thinking.  Leo Buscalgia, J. Krishnamurti, Joseph Campbell, Swami Vivekananda,  Deepak Chopra, Schopenhauer, Shirley Maclaine, and many others.  I am not counting the authors I read for my academic work.  I first started with Shirley Mclaine's 'Out on a limb' which is actually a memoir, although it reads like a novel.  That was where I learnt about Akashic records, Jesus's missing years and many other aspects that puzzle our human minds.  Leo Buscaglia was simply what he was known all his life as...'Dr. Love.' I read his books and sold the audio tapes of his books at the Talking Book Store, I managed in DC. I must have read at least 5-6 books by Buscalgia, Mclaine, and Deepak Chopra.  I soon outgrew those.  They were good starters but simplistic.  Swami Vivekananda was the first real spiritual writing with depth that I read.  It fired up a storm of courage inside me, that has kept me going till today.  Campbell, merely made hindu teachings and asian philosophies more tangible.  And Krishnamurti's all time favorite line, which is also the core of asian philosophies, still brings me to the present, the safest of all places for our thoughts--'watch your mind!'


Pay attention to your thoughts.  Mind either races forward or backward.  But when it is in the present, truly in the present, like being on the plane, where you cannot escape, then we also know....there is no fear. For for most of us, most of the times, there is no impending danger.


So, the three authors that had the most impact on me were-- J. Krishnamurti, Joseph Campbell, Swami Vivekananda.  Swami Vivekananda being the greatest impact.


Here I provide the gist of Mr. Fulghum's first book that till this day remains the most popular.  This was also on the book jacket, and in the US college room poster sale always had one of these....and it has sparked many other versions such as 'All I need to know I learnt by my cat..../ dog/...'


But here is what caught our hearts first, and it still rings true!!


The book was All I need to know, I learnt in Kindergarten


All I really need to know I learned in kindergarten.
ALL I REALLY NEED TO KNOW about how to live and what to do
and how to be I learned in kindergarten. Wisdom was not
at the top of the graduate-school mountain, but there in the
sandpile at Sunday School. These are the things I learned:


Share everything.

Play fair.

Don't hit people.

Put things back where you found them.

Clean up your own mess.

Don't take things that aren't yours.

Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.

Wash your hands before you eat.

Flush.

Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.

Live a balanced life - learn some and think some
and draw and paint and sing and dance and play
and work every day some.

Take a nap every afternoon.

When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic,
hold hands, and stick together.

Be aware of wonder.
Remember the little seed in the styrofoam cup:
The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody
really knows how or why, but we are all like that.

Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even
the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die.
So do we.

And then remember the Dick-and-Jane books
and the first word you learned - the biggest
word of all - LOOK.

Everything you need to know is in there somewhere.
The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation.
Ecology and politics and equality and sane living.

Take any of those items and extrapolate it into sophisticated adult terms and apply it to your family life or your work or your government or your world and it holds true and clear and firm.

Think what a better world it would be if all - the whole world - had cookies and milk about three o'clock every afternoon and then lay down with our blankies for a nap. Or if all governments had a basic policy to always put thing back where they found them and to clean up their own mess.

And it is still true, no matter how old youare - when you go out into the world, it is best
to hold hands and stick together.


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