In Search of a Home

Welcome!! Swagat, Dumela, Valkommen, Jee Aayan Noo, Tashreef, Bula, Swasdee, Bienvenido, Tashi Delek. Thanks for joining me......


Saturday, January 21, 2023

A Special Post : Two Stories --Same Human Connection

Today I am writing for those who visit this specially.

Those come here to read my updates and those who have followed it for years. As I have mentioned else place on this blog, I have YouTube channel and I have another places where I contribute regularly. 

So, coming here is not as regular. 

But I will never give up this space. 

This blog holds special meaning for me. Not just because this was the first blog I ever created. But for a few other reasons.

1. Those special people who still click on it, on purpose. I know there are many (I get about 200-600 hits a month) who come here for  topic or images.  But then there are others who come for the writing or simply to check up on what have I been upto. So, this post is specially for them, who come to get an update about me, and sometimes email me or leave a comment on the blog. 

Thanks, and please leave comments, it always makes my day. 

2. I have documented my life here in some way for the last 12 years. 

Yes, 12 years. 

This blog does not give a detailed account of my personal life.

Yet, if you read through many of the posts, you will figure out many themes and meanings in my life.

On an average I have about 36-37 posts a year. 

Considering that during this time, I have travelled through 17 brand new countries (not counting those before 2010. The year 2009, which I still need to write about in detail, was something special. I travelled through 13 different countries, on train, bus, boat, and ofcourse planes). 

I have published about 12 professional articles,15 non academic, one short story on amazon, started a youtube channel, working on a larger book length project right now...and released my first 24 minute film last year. I have been India about India about 11 times, to the US 6 times, to Spain 4 times, Germany 3 times, Japan 2 times...so and so forth....

Yet, on an average 36-37 posts a year.

During this time writing emails has gone downhill, although I am one of the few people who still writes emails. 

Most emails, with most people were repetitive.  

Around late in first decade of 2000, people started to put their pictures and thoughts on FaceBook. 

Something, I still do not do.

I share the pictures I take, to give a perspective. Not pictures of me or my family.

Somethings should remain private. My simplistic thinking.

There is a tradition in India of not saying the name of those you love. Especially between married couples. Its a way of protecting that energy. Keeping it sacred. 

Same with images of people. 

But also, a realisation that my pictures should not be imposed on other people's feeds. My pics are not important.  Even if I think they are.

So they remain with me. 

Although to be honest, I have a hard time finding pictures of myself. I am always behind the camera.

A little creativity --and  picture becomes more intriguing rather than a show 


The ones I take of myself are usually on my computer, in Photo Booth. Its like a time lag of 200 photos over 10 years. 

But I choose to write here, because it brings me back the simplicity, when I wrote simply to write, and wrote for a few friends.

And I continue.

Many of the posts here are not saved on my computer. I think they should be. 

I have so many precious incidents documented here.

The past decade has always been difficult with regards to life issues.

Yes Life issues, something that I hardly share on this blog. At least not openly. 

Sometimes, when I return to this blog, I am amazed at how much I have recorded. I could not have written it all in my hand written journals. 

I must admit writing in a journal is different from writing on this blog. I know that this can be accessed by strangers, no matter that it is anonymous. There is always a fear of being found out. And I want to limit some thoughts to my journals. 


There are many ways of adding story to a picture....I love what light and camera angles can do, even with computer's Photo Booth


So, today, on a Saturday, even though I generally post on Friday evenings, I decided to dedicate some time to this blog.

I want to share two incidents from this week. First about food, and second about unplanned conversations that can evoke nostalgia, a strong yet fleeting connection and rejuvenate us because it brings us human connection. 

I have been working in Gothenburg. Love the city. 

But also some days I buy cooked food to save time. And because I am simply exhausted, working between two towns. But more importantly here I have access to so much 'international food'. Even getting nice Chinese or Italian in Karlstad is not easy.

Here in Goteborg, I can get Indian and Greek, and Chinese and Vietnamese ....you name it.

I stay in city centre. Even better, close to metro and buses, and very close to many eateries.

So, this last week I visited an Indian restaurant for a take away twice. I have been having some 'gum' issues.  So have restricted my food to soups, rice and noodles for a few weeks.

Rice and daal, sounded wholesome and warm and healthy.

I got it two days ago on Wednesday. The  yesterday, that is friday, I went again and ordered the same.

The person serving me at the counter insisted I have something else. 

'No try no 81, or 83, they are all vegetarian'.

At some point, he asked me where I was from. He told me the last time he was from India. This time, he told me he was from Nepal and asked if I could speak hindi.

We started chatting in hindi. He insisted that I try something other than what `i ordered.

I have to be careful, and need to have something soft., I said.

'yes,' i assure you 81 channa masala is soft and delicious. he repeated.

Ok, I ordered, and then asked, 'but why do you insist when I am fine with what i had two days ago?'

'Because you have to try other things from our place, because it is good for your mouth and taste to try something new.'

I simply smiled. It was a combination of 'care and pride'. He wanted me to have a good experience, also wanted me to think good of his restaurant.

There's an asian touch. As we call it, Apnapan. The feeling of belonging. 

I smiled, and we talked about a few other things. How he came to this country. He told me he had been here for 5 years. He shared his name. I told him I knew another Kamal *meaning lotus, from Nepal. I told him people usually thought I was from Nepal or Mexico or Spain or Italy, its interesting how I am perceived. 

I asked him I could get a small packet of sweetened aniseed, which you get in Indian restaurants after meals. Its is a digesting and a mouth freshner.

He packed the anise, and two types of chutneys.

Ah, the feeling of familiarity lasted the whole evening. For a short time, on a cold evening, I felt like I was home.

Second Incident.  Three days ago. Wednesday. The first time I went to that restaurant to get rice and daal, I stopped at Kvillefoto (https://kvillefoto.se) to ask if they could get me a few negatives of a few glamour shots, some old family pics etc. (you can watch the video here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=02T6b4NHX7w)

The best part was that without thinking I did my first few minutes of conversation in Swedish.

He said that they did. But today there is no need for a negative because they make a digital image of it and can remove any scratches etc. 

I wanted to ask him about getting a camera for my youtube channel. 

'Oh I know nothing of it' he said. I was surprised. Then he pointed at the long row of cameras behind him and said, 'All these are analogs. These are old cameras. Film is still hard to find, but they are getting more and more demand. Analog is coming back in fashion, people want to see pictures that are not perfect....'

I was listening intently. I talked about my first Pentax and realised that even that was not an analogue. I had forgotten. I never owned an analogue. Maybe the disposals ones.

I have two of my father's cameras. One of them, Minolta, really dear to him. 

So I talked about Minolta, long lenses, and another one that my father gave me, a really old camera.

The man smiled.

Then I told him to watch Sean Tucker's youtube channel.  He said, he already did.

He shared a few pictures, told me about following natural light and showed me various ways I could get some pasteboards if I wished. 

I have been meaning to get pasteboards made of flowers from different countries. 

Then I asked him, if I could interview him about photography for my channel. He agreed.

I was so happy. Only I know how hard it is for me to find time. I have gazillion ideas but to keep it all up is hard.

But still such a soulful conversation, that when I stepped out of the photoshop I had a spring in my walk.

Such power, human connection has.

So, I wanted this to be focus of my very first story of 2023. I hope you will remember and I wish you experience many warm moments like this in the coming year.